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Luvvie Ajayi Jones

Luvvie Ajayi Jones is a TED speaker, podcast host and 3x New York Times bestselling author: Professional Troublemaker: The Fear-Fighter Manual, Rising Troublemaker: A Fear-Fighter Manual for Teens, I’m Judging You: The Do-Better Manual.

What about fear?

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They sell glasses online.

And because so much is hidden from our conscious awareness, we end up inventing answers that feel true but are often very wrong.

If you don't take advantage of the greatest experiment in the history of mankind, and that is the US economy, people say we embrace failure, that's bullshit.

Now, those are over-simplified generalizations about the nature of intelligence.

The fundamental attribution error is the idea that when bad things happen to us, we think it's because of external events.

I want to show you today three things I've learned about recognizing originals and becoming a little bit more like them.

So I said something.

So do you have the mindset that foods that are good for you, healthy foods are disgusting and depriving, or do you have the mindset that healthy foods are indulgent and delicious?

The question we need to ask is can behavior change the brain?

Passive experience will shape the brain just because of the way that the chemicals that are sloshing around in there and the way that the neurons are arranged and all sorts of things.

So it is our job, it is our obligation, it is our duty to speak truth to power, to be the domino, not just when it's difficult -- especially when it's difficult.

And so I only get like five minutes in before someone's like, "Excuse me, we don't know why you're here."

So if I were to ask you to make a list of all the reasons your romantic relationship was going the way it was, what would you say?

He was yelled at for attempting to board one group too soon.

So what I've learned in the last couple of years is you can absolutely teach courage.

So when you see those things, don't make the same mistake I did.

So, how I like to think about it is that, placebo effects, as they're traditionally construed are made up of three things.

The signal that generates the plasticity is the making of errors.

So if you look at somebody you don't know very well, all the little annoying habits that they have are just going to be outside of scope for you, and you will just imagine that they all work well.

You have to take outsize risks to punch above your weight class and find someone more interesting than you.

But sometimes and certainly now, a crisis comes along that is so new and so urgent that it upends everything we thought we knew.

In my pursuit of pleasure, I have essentially decreased my ability to experience pleasure and increased my baseline state of pain.

And then I would get on the elliptical for 30 minutes, 'cause I thought I had to do that also.

To be clear, I think exercise is wonderful and healthy, can improve cardiovascular function, maintain strength, bone density, all that good stuff.

And each of those different things, creativity, focus and task switching, involves different neurochemicals in different states of mind and body.

My father was a high-functioning alcoholic, but I thought somehow though those genes skipped me.

Make sure you talk about the harms and risks of addiction to these digital drugs.

For a line of dominoes to fall, one has to fall first, which then leaves the other choiceless to do the same.

The reason we like flying Southwest Airlines is not because they necessarily hire better people.

It's up to us to choose to learn and grow from our mistakes and our tragedies, and our successes.

But in a short period of time, you can dial in the exact nootropic formulas for the states of mind and body that you want to be in.

But if we can find empathy, if we can find understanding, the change could be toward a positive turning point.

So as it turns out, our bodies really neurobiologically experience joy as vulnerability and threat, and we quiver.

And that means, I'm prepared, I'm ready to answer, I'm gonna answer you now.

So some research showing that stress narrows our focus, increases our attention, speeds up the rate at which we're able to process information.

We designed a measure to test people's mindsets about stress.

Now I need more of my drug to restore homeostasis or to "get high." I need more potent forms of my drug.

Basically kids take gradually increasing doses of the thing they're allergic to, like peanuts.

He wrote as much in his journal.

Don't write them off.

In every past version, the main character has been an evil queen.

And then what I see in families and in children is over the course of that month, kids start to return to who they used to be.

"Is meditation effective in retraining dopamine regulation?" - So meditation is something that requires effortful engagement, and it has been shown to increase dopamine levels, and I would consider it.

Let me show you: this is a depiction of how the creative process works for most of us.

It's sometimes trying to put you out of business, but at the very minimum is working hard to frustrate your growth and steal your business from you.

But not only are we seeing increased rates of addiction, we're seeing increased rates of anxiety, depression, suicide.

So, people who have a stresses debilitating mindset and we've shown this in our research, tend to go to one of the other of those extremes.

You see, if the conditions are wrong, we are forced to expend our own time and energy to protect ourselves from each other, and that inherently weakens the organization.

Now, you may be wondering, how did this guy become great without doing a whole lot?

There's a love there, and I wanted to know why is it that I don't have people that I work with like that?

I think, my goal is really to move us beyond the placebo versus drug, mindset versus behavior, to get to a place where we can blend them together and maximize the benefit of these treatments.

Then why do we consider laying off people inside our organization?

Then the motivation is, how do I utilize the stress to realize the enhancing outcomes?

And on the flip side, the people who race in are in such a frenzy of anxiety that they don't have original thoughts either.

Do you view cancer as an unmitigated catastrophe, or do you view cancer as manageable or perhaps even an opportunity.

It is only then that I look at my audience, and then I just take a second to get myself together, and to begin With practice, obviously you're gonna get better and better and better.

We can talk to people who fundamentally disagree with us, and we can do it without arguing.

We can become confident through our own achievements.

People are so afraid of these acute consequences, not realizing that there are many times when we walk in rooms and we are some of the most powerful people in those rooms -- we might be the second-most powerful, third-most powerful.

The thing that can really take you off track economically and emotionally in your 20s and 30s, people say, "Oh, a sickness." The reality is, most sickness is of the aged.

He said, quote: "Our communities are being destroyed by racial tensions, and we're too polite to talk about it." I'm not asking you to be tolerant of each other.

But then again, there must be crossover between conscious thought and these subconscious or kind of autonomic pathways.

I've been a journalist for nearly 20 years, and quite frankly I can tell you there's no way to downplay the serious situation that we're in as a nation.

It's much easier to improve on somebody else's idea than it is to create something new from scratch.

When that balance tips to one side, we experience pleasure, and when it tips to the other, we experience pain.

So the lesson I learned is that to be original you don't have to be first.

And they are absolutely fundamental in a world in which we're being constantly tempted to indulge.

It's only when you're told that you're going to be working on this problem, and then you start procrastinating, but the task is still active in the back of your mind, that you start to incubate.

And I'm not sure we can always explain every fight, what it is about, but how do we prevent those?

I can not find in 200,000 pieces of data a single example of courage that was not completely defined by vulnerability.

What could really take you off-course in your 20s and 30s and 40s, quite frankly, is making a bad decision around a partner, and that is divorce.

Others we randomly assign to procrastinate by dangling Minesweeper in front of them for either five or 10 minutes.

So what we did was we took these women and we randomized them into two groups, and we told half of them that their work was good exercise.

You just have to be different and better.

Coke Japan comes out with a new product every three weeks, because they have no idea what's going to work and what's not.

She actually was the one who said to me originally, you know, I was an athlete at the time.

Being the domino, for me, looks like speaking up and doing the things that are really difficult, especially when they are needed, with the hope that others will follow suit.

That people who can spread ideas, regardless of what those ideas are, win.

So these are just three examples of dozens of unicorns that asked "What?" instead of "Why?" Do I have any Nathans or Sarahs, or Joses in the room?

Lots of studies have shown that believing you're eating different things changes your tastes and even your satisfaction and fullness after.

So to answer your question, I think that that could be true, but it depends on what actually is the mindset you're evoking.

Now in a large manufacturing company, this is a big deal, and they could no longer afford their labor pool.

The more confident you became, the wider your fingers were spreading.

When it comes to healthy food, I think it's harder to change people's mindsets because we have a lot of baggage weighing us down.

The things we wish we could redo, if you look at the science, are the chances not taken.

In fact, as Bastian put it, it is far more important to communicate when you don't have the answers than when you do.

Here we're talking about map shifts, but this could be learning a new language, this could be any number of different things that we're attempting.

The brain changes when certain neurochemicals, namely acetylcholine, epinephrin, and dopamine, are released in ways and in the specific times that allow for neural circuits to be marked for change.

It's about controlling my environment, but making sure that what I'm transmitting, at all times, is confidence.

Take classical composers, the best of the best.

So we have pre-synaptic neurons, and we have post-synaptic neurons, and between them is a gap called the synapse.

What is that? That is some deep, deep emotion, when you would want to do that.

That is a healthy part of evolutionary progress, and the way you get there is no different than a hedge fund manager.

I started writing the procrastination chapter, and one day -- I was halfway through -- I literally put it away in mid-sentence for months.

And let me just say that nicotine is highly addictive, and the withdrawal phase is very, very quick many, many times through the course of a day.

I will answer it in the pace, manner, and tone that I choose." And in doing that, we are demonstrating that we are confident, and in control.

But confidence is something that we can grow, we can nurture.

But what that was doing, was putting me into this constant mindset of restraint.

I mean, I have seen people in wheelchairs that are supremely confident.

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